Making art is not easy for me. There is a strong gravitational pull to do nothing. All I want to do when not making art is make art, but when I have the time I always struggle against that gravity. I have to shed the weight of fear and doubt that always threatens to keep me from putting pen to paper in order to begin. And there are times when that weight is too much to shed. The problem is that each time I let the doubt and fear prevent me from working it gets heavier and the next time it is harder still. And a cycle of doubt and avoidance is born. It is the act of making that cuts free the encumbrance. Fear and doubt reside in inaction. Creation requires action.
In my more expansive and conceited moments I think of making art as a form of myth making. Myth is only effective when enacted – via a storyteller or ritual. It has no power when static, but when in process it has the power to create and define a world. Drawing is a ritual act, it is an act of power and re-creation for me. But the importance of the action also imbues it with a sense of dread and the possibility of stumbling in execution often fills me with doubt regarding my abilities to pull it off. As in ritual and storytelling the key is preparation. You have to prepare the materials and ground prior to the act. You have to set aside the time and get yourself into the right frame of mind. You have to flip a mental switch so that you are no longer in the everyday, but instead reside in creative time and space where fear and doubt are alien entities. The act of creation can only occur in that place.